Yes, great article. One thing keeps coming to my mind, is in one of the classes undergrad psychology, the prof said, in order to be able to do serious cruelty to another, one has to justify one’s actions. And, it has stuck with me years later.
Is it possible the guy in your story who went to Vietnam and even killed a child( children) justified it, then he could do it. And is it possible the reason he looked “normal” afterwards and continued being a lawyer as though nothing had happened that the justification that he had come up with is still working for him, thus no regrets! ( thinking out loud)
I really relate to all of this, Tom. I have struggled with PTSD since I was twelve and still have some trouble with it today. The book you recommended is excellent. I actually think writing has been more healing than anything I’ve tried. I can’t wait to read your dad’s answer.
While it’s true that hurt people hurt people, it doesn’t mean it’s right and it doesn’t mean it’s unavoidable. We are all given a free will by our Creator and so we choose. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, incest, and rape myself, I can tell you that the body does in fact keep the score. There are lasting consequences for our sins, including those we perpetrate against others. We are all sinners. We always have a choice. We all need a Savior. Not religion, but a relationship with our God who has made a way for that in His Son, Jesus Christ. I have taught classes on trauma recovery, and I have seen many people choose to remain in a victim status, holding onto their bitterness and refusing to forgive. When we forgive, we release ourselves from bondage. It’s not for the monster who hurt us, but for ourselves so that we can live the abundant life we were meant to live. While I also love the book The Body Keeps The Score, I strongly disagree with the notion that the “now lawyer once murderer rapist” couldn’t help it. He had a choice and so do we. Choose life, not death. Forgive and be forgiven.
Yes, great article. One thing keeps coming to my mind, is in one of the classes undergrad psychology, the prof said, in order to be able to do serious cruelty to another, one has to justify one’s actions. And, it has stuck with me years later.
Is it possible the guy in your story who went to Vietnam and even killed a child( children) justified it, then he could do it. And is it possible the reason he looked “normal” afterwards and continued being a lawyer as though nothing had happened that the justification that he had come up with is still working for him, thus no regrets! ( thinking out loud)
Interesting to see what your father responds.
I really relate to all of this, Tom. I have struggled with PTSD since I was twelve and still have some trouble with it today. The book you recommended is excellent. I actually think writing has been more healing than anything I’ve tried. I can’t wait to read your dad’s answer.
Good article; trauma, and in particular childhood trauma of various kinds, stays with the person well into adullthood. Yes, the body keeps score.
While it’s true that hurt people hurt people, it doesn’t mean it’s right and it doesn’t mean it’s unavoidable. We are all given a free will by our Creator and so we choose. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, incest, and rape myself, I can tell you that the body does in fact keep the score. There are lasting consequences for our sins, including those we perpetrate against others. We are all sinners. We always have a choice. We all need a Savior. Not religion, but a relationship with our God who has made a way for that in His Son, Jesus Christ. I have taught classes on trauma recovery, and I have seen many people choose to remain in a victim status, holding onto their bitterness and refusing to forgive. When we forgive, we release ourselves from bondage. It’s not for the monster who hurt us, but for ourselves so that we can live the abundant life we were meant to live. While I also love the book The Body Keeps The Score, I strongly disagree with the notion that the “now lawyer once murderer rapist” couldn’t help it. He had a choice and so do we. Choose life, not death. Forgive and be forgiven.