Can victimhood be a good thing?
Letter #22
Hey Dad!
Thanks for letting me take this newsletter for a spin two issues in a row. 😊
I didn’t want to throw our previous discussion by the wayside, so let’s get into it.
In letter #20, you asked “Are you guys still not getting paid what you’re worth in spite of your education?”
To get into my argument, this slide from Scott’s talk on Youtube says it all.
At age 25, we’re making 25% less than our grandparents were adjusted for inflation and the cost to buy a house has more than doubled.
That’s a real kick in the belly, that one.
I looked up how the average homeownership rate has changed in the last 30 years and found this article from Urban.org.
When talking about head of household ownership rates among young people, the article states “we can see a 15.4 percentage-point decline between 1990 and 2021.”
So more young people are not buying homes nowadays.
Oddly enough, this decline correlates with a declining marriage rate. Young people aren’t getting married as often as previous generations.
“The share of married young adults has declined from 59.4 percent in 1990 to 38.6 percent in 2021,” states the above article.
Now we have to figure out why that’s happened. Why has the marriage rate declined so sharply? And does our financial situation have something to do with it?
The answer is yes, but there are other factors at play here as well. An article from The Hill titled ‘The End Of Marriage In America?’ points to a few factors..
Women’s economic independence and gender equality.
American attitudes about getting married have changed.
Declining religious adherence to marriage
Public disenchantment with marriage
Unstable jobs and strained finances
A 2017 analysis from the Pew Research Center showed that 41% of adults who had never been married but indicated they may tie the knot in the future said financial instability was a major reason they were not yet married.
It’s funny, after I published letter #19 I had a private discussion with someone who basically told me to suck it up and that this happens with every generation.
But the data explicitly shows that average earnings and housing prices weren’t NEARLY this bad for our grandparents or our parents.
I’m not suggesting you lived in Candyland either. I know it was tough for you and Mom and for many members of the older generations. But this economy is damn near impossible to thrive in for us young people.
I know young people close to me who donate plasma because they can’t afford life.
I know that Conservatives are all about pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and personal responsibility, and I think there’s a lot of beauty to that idea.. but at what point does ‘pulling yourself up by your bootstraps’ not work?
I know people with Master’s Degrees here in Mexico City who barely make $1,500 per month.
Where is the tipping point?
I think a lot of our Gen X/Baby Boomer readers are angry at us young people. They get upset at us complaining because they had to struggle through life and they feel our situations aren’t much different than theirs were.
BUT THE DATA SHOWS EXPLICITLY THAT IT IS DIFFERENT. It’s much different! It’s much harder! And at what point do we admit, as a people, that it has gone too far?
One time I made a video about the Philippines and how the people there are so happy despite their hardship. I had a lot of great comments, as expected, but one comment ruined the premise of my video and stuck in my craw ever since.
The person said something like “Tom, if Filipinos got angry about the injustices happening, then maybe something would actually change. Them being happy despite their suffering might not be a strength. It’s actually holding them back from escaping their hardships.”
I understand that overdosing on victimhood isn’t the best recipe for a happy life, but if the founding fathers never thought of themselves as victims underneath the tyrannical rule of the British Crown, then we wouldn’t have the United States of America, either.
In a way our country was built on the backs of great men and women who were sick of being victims and did something about it.
The other day here in Mexico City we were at a Burger King getting some gringo food. The service was absolutely abysmal. ALL of the soda options from the machine were spitting out water. I told one worker this while she stared at her phone and she told me in response “I’ll check it in a second.”
She then spent the next 5 minutes doing anything but checking it.
I’m sitting here with my food getting cold waiting for ANY of the 10 soda options to be serviceable.
The guy guarding the store had to go back and fix it because a line started to form at the soda machine. Dad, it was simply unreal. One of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever seen.
Later that day I looked up online why customer service is so horrible in Mexico. I found this nice article that explains, basically, that Mexicans have just gotten used to being treated like crap by companies here and don’t speak up for themselves.
It’s the same thing that we see in the Philippines. People just accept the sh*tstorm of life and move on. While this level of acceptance is crazy awe-inspiring, it’s also self-defeating. Ben Franklin wrote “the squeaky wheel gets the oil.”
I guess my overarching question is WHEN?
When are people allowed to be the victim?
It’s funny how victimhood is so severely chastised by members of the right, the same party that champions free enterprise. Wouldn’t it make sense for members of this party to brainwash their followers that victimhood is a ‘mind virus’ that needs to be eradicated so they can keep the sheep in line on their conveyor belt to endless profits?
I don’t know. I really don’t. And for the record, I feel the Left uses victimhood to keep people under their control just as much as the right uses it as a weapon to galvanize their followers.
It’s just a mess.
A lot of people in the comments section told me that I shouldn’t point fingers at any given generation for what’s happening.
Well, what can I do, then?
I’ve only had the right to vote for a few years now. I’m not the generation that voted for the people who made things the way they are now. And for the record, I’m not even really writing this for any other reason than to show you how I feel.
I’ve already kind of accepted my lot in life. I’m not sitting here banging my fist on the table calling for revolution. I don’t really want to blame you, Mom, or the older generation either. I’m just letting you know how we, the younger generation, feel.
I think a lot of us are angry. I also think a lot of us have just kind of given up.
I don’t know what you’ll have to say about this, but I’m all ears as always.
Thanks for listening.